MY HAND IN YOURS ;

Friday, March 28, 2008 ;

brother's back from thailand :) with a nice gucci bag for me! haha he wanted to buy me a white gucci watch (smart boy knows i've been wanting a nice white watch) but it was like what a few hundred dollars. my gosh, if he really did buy it i'd scold him! hahah

:) i have been eating XLB too often! but it's so nice! i'm addicted :D

anyways mother bok had a fall today. she wanted to hang the clothes but didn't realise how wet the balcony floor was. so she's lying in bed now with a ter-kah. how to spell that. hahahah pigs trotter. okay lah it's not that swollen but i was sad.

:) but she's gooood. could have been much worse, so praise God :) she's really protected lah :) see, my words never come back to me void :) my prayers, God answers.

but do pray for her :)
she looks quite cute with her trotter hahahahahahaha i'm so bad :D

WE WILL DANCE ; 5:47 AM

Saturday, March 22, 2008 ;

shoulda told me if i did somethin you thought was wrong. now things have come to this and.. and i really don't know anymore. what's worth fightin for and what's not. i thought you said it was forever. what happened to forever?

i don't know what's been goin on but just so you know, i've never not wanted to meet you both.

what happened to "i'll love you more in 2008".
what happened man, what happened.

God, You've brought me so far that i can't turn back. but as said by Chase Collins, who said it has to be about goin back? maybe it's about being right where you are.

but you know what.
Love has taken me in for good.

that's all you need princess, that's all you'll ever need.

WE WILL DANCE ; 10:56 AM

Sunday, March 16, 2008 ;

you know, sometimes i'm not sure if i'm just being bitter or whether it is that i see it better cos i've been through it before. but yeah like what i told ding, it doesn't really matter to me anymore :) you can have fun without me, and on the same wavelength, i can enjoy without you too because you're not my world even though i love you :) alot.

though honestly going isn't the smartest thing to do, and i'm not saying that bad things will surely happen while you guys are there but definitely it is not wise. perhaps i've just come to a point where i really know so well that my leaders say and do things for a reason and not just "happy happy say yes happy happy say no". yeah, we're not prophesying that things will go wrong but why run straight into the arms of temptation right?

:) haha and actually ah, if already settle everything, might as well not ask. okay lah, i mean personally i feel that since you've already settled things and have made up your minds to go, asking the leaders wouldn't change your decisions no matter what answer they give because everything is already settled.

i mean, we did want to go overseas together too, babu des john guan and i, and sam ding. but we asked the leaders before even planning anything, because i dunno i guess it just makes more sense haha. cos if they're answer really means something to you and you're not asking just to be accountable, then i think that you would respect what they say. so yeah, babu john and des are going, but not with us girls :) and it's okay for us girls because even though we really really wanted to go together and have fun, it's not like we'll die if we don't go.

i'm fine with not being asked to go with you guys. haha i don't think i would have gone anyway :) so yeah i guess it was smart of you not to even ask me :) haha cos i would have been tempted to. but yah. i know you'll enjoy there lah. a break is always good :)

so,
enjoy your side of the mountain while i enjoy mine :)

loveyou!

WE WILL DANCE ; 10:29 AM

i asked myself all these questions, but then i remembered..
i've got You :)

so i don't need these questions anymore
won't need to let my tears go crashing to the floor
my side of the mountain's actually really beautiful
as long as there's You

and that's one promise i can keep forever :)

WE WILL DANCE ; 6:50 AM

Tuesday, March 11, 2008 ;

so, what do you mean when you say "we should go out again soon"?
because i don't want to be left hanging again, silly.

"major insult to your beauty"
okay thanks :)

WE WILL DANCE ; 7:51 AM

Saturday, March 08, 2008 ;

Dare 2 Play 4 was today :) and it felt like D2P3 was just a couple of months ago! pam and i were just laughing at the MGS scary backstage and toilets, and really, it didn't feel like a year ago. but i see myself today and i remember myself back then :) it has been such a good journey man.

but today was fun lah :) amazingly fun. hahah i seriously enjoyed myself on stage! and though i confess i sang wrongly when we did Solution, but haha i'm so glad i remembered what Joy shared about laughing it off.

i was so involved with the youths at the side i was standing on until i literally forgot to turn back to sean and look at his hand signals or was it pastor dan, and you know what. because for set piece we usually do that part ( i think it was bridge? ) 4 times before going to chorus...

but. smart me didn't watch out for hand signals so i thought we were doing the normal thing but nnnoooooooo! hahaha as i happily danced with the kids and sang out the 4th bridge with such conviction, i suddenly wondered why mine was the only voice i heard in my in-ear.

then i realised, OMG! they went to chorus already lor! thanks!

HAHAAH i very nearly burst out laughing :) which was funny because when those youths in front of me saw me grinning goofily, they started laughing too. which was nice to see cos you know at least they don't get the impression that oh if you make a mistake you better watch out for lightning and all.

it's about having fun in the presence of God lah. you know, usually i would have been like, o man what did i just do!! and like kick myself for every note sung off pitch. but today was just.. different :)

like i felt so free. to dance, to sing, to even make mistakes. felt so free to be me. and that felt good :) because just the way i am, together with my mistakes, is how i am loved. because just the way i am, together with my shortcomings, is how i am loved.

so i sang and i danced and yes i went flat on some parts, but still i was loved and still i was free to be me and be loved as me.

and i guess that's the beauty of worship :) that's the power of praise. you go before the throne, your heart and soul bared, your guards let down, your walls broken. you go before the throne, and there you find yourself in Love's embrace. there you find rest. there you find peace. there you find joy. there you find restoration. there you find provision. there you find a supply that always exceeds the demand.

Dare 2 Play 4 :) i had so much fun on stage today i forgot to be conscious of myself :))) to be lost in Love's embrace :) man, this is what i'm called to do.

WE WILL DANCE ; 3:43 AM

Thursday, March 06, 2008 ;

sometimes, you get so used to losing that it feels weird when you first win. and it feels like you don't know what's happening to you. but you gotta let it all go :) yeah, you were a loser, but now, it's different.

because now, you're a winner. and what does a winner do?

:) a winner wins.

hello world :))

WE WILL DANCE ; 12:30 AM